Goodbyes have never been a strength of mine. I prefer a “see you soon”. It is less permanent, less definitive. And in the case of this gym this is definitely more accurate. The gym will be there in a form or another – stable and timeless as that old factory building it lives, breathes and sweats in.
Fighting is life condensed, says coach and like life nothing is forever in the view of time and space. So therefore, also my time in the field as a researcher had to come to an end. I learned plenty and leave more skilled, humble and with a huge respect for consistency and determination and humans that I would probably have never encountered if it was not for this gym. I stepped out of my comfort zone and grew and this is something I will be grateful for. It was not always easy, but I am glad for all the days I pulled up with my car in this particular parking lot, walked down the stairs, left some sweat on the mats and went home with observations for my field diary.
One guy once said, “so this is what we are to you just research?”, back then I did not know what to answer. It is a tough one because so many different layers come into play. Now time has passed and I have left the gym as a researcher and I can say, no you are not ‘just research’ to me. To me you are humans, teachers, fellow learners, part of my life’s journey, inspiration, frustration, insecurity, etc. Basically, a mirror for all those things that are part of life.
Even if I am not a fighter I understand and feel the saying of coach “Fighting is life condensed” and I add here to bring it back to my research “fighting is life condensed socially, temporal and spatially”. So, this is my task now, working through all this data to tell a story that gives justice to all these lives condensed in a martial arts gym in Leicester.
And I will try with consistency and determination like a fighter. On that note, I was never considering to fight. However, I had three walk-out songs and walked out a million times in my head. Now they will be the soundtrack to me walking into the office. Yes, I am coming in hot!
See you soon!
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